A lot of us spend a lot of time trying to mould ourselves into an ideal life and an ideal “us”. An ideal version of ourselves. A little more this, a little less that.

Ironically, by pursuing an ideal you wind up losing your true self, which is ideal to begin with. The imperfections of a person arent part of who they are – they are external things that were learned (often defence mechanisms against hurt) and these coat the true ideal self like the outer layers of an onion.

Many people pursue happiness by trying to force themselves into living the ideal life as they see it should be eg make lots of money, get married, have 2.3 kids etc etc. They may even achieve perfect self-discpline and control, or others may strive to master how to influence others and have power over them – but in so doing they will sacrifice their true selves.

– Deepak Chopra (paraphrased)


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