Gender Differences

I was just reading a book where they suggested some gender differences. Interesting ideas – and I think they sound about right, but I have yet to 100% confirm these 🙂

  • Listening: Women show they’re listening by being animated, nodding, and making "listening noises" like "uh huh", "really?" etc. Men listen in still-life and only nod if they agree with what is being said. Both genders can be great listeners – they just listen in different ways. Men can see women’s supportive noises/ words as interruptions. So it’s recommended for women to cut out the nodding and uh huhs and for men to insert them when speaking to the opposite sex.
  • Talking frequency: There have been countless studies on verbosity, and not one was able to prove that women spoke more. But talking frequency may vary in different contexts. As a massive generalization, men tend to talk a lot more than women at work because this is how they express their natural competitive tendencies. Then when they get home they take a vacation from talking by eg watching the tv or reading the newspaper etc. Women spread out their talking frequency between work and home-life equally.
    To many men, talking is to win something—an argument, the respect of a boss or his colleagues, a woman. And, when he is feeling completely comfortable, there is no need to talk. To many men, life is a talk show—and everything he says must be right. But that’s work! And when he’s with
    the woman who loves him, he can happily relax, and be quiet.
  • Bonding strategies: men bond by doing things together eg watching a game together, women bond by talking. I suppose this links in a bit with the talking frequency point…
  • Talking subject matter: Most males don’t consider their every passing thought important enough to impart, so only talk about what they consider the important things. Most women would be quite content drifting along on her man’s stream of consciousness—whether the stream ended up any place he thought important or not.
  • Sympathy: When growing up, when a girl hurts herself after doing something stupid (eg petting a hissing stray cat), she is likely to get sympathy from her parents. When a little boy does the same thing, gender differences in upbringing mean that he is more likely to be chided for doing something that is a bit unwise. The result is that later in life, men are less likely to be sympathetic to what they’d consider a lesson that needs to be learned. eg if a woman complains her feet hurt from walking in high heels all night – some males may show little sympathy.

– Leil Lowndes


1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. carrumba.tng
    May 03, 2008 @ 20:43:07

    From my own experience, i would disagree with this.  It takes no account of peoples mental state and self confidence.  I for example have predicted a lot of the trends at my work place but am crap at being outspoken – i tend to speak more at home where i am in my comfort zone.  My wife however, is a confident speaker at work but, to a certain extent, is intimidated by my background knowledge but has no hesitation when telling me about the jobs I should be doing in the house. *lol*Personally, I find this theory too simplistic as you will find that peoples’ training, as with my work, makes better communicators of all employees whether male or female.  Nature n nurture thing there I guess.Loving the philosophy questions… keep them coming. 🙂


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